5 things I'm trying to improve about myself
Updated: Oct 6, 2020
I've always been the type of person who enjoyed a routine and having a purpose. I was good at managing my time, I always dedicated time for self-care, I was productive and mostly had a positive attitude and a strong belief that things would always work out ok.
But in the last year or so, I've felt very stuck and like I've lost my way a little bit. I think that's probably normal to go through these phases in life, but I'm so over it now. Not to sound dramatic but I don't like myself very much at the moment and I feel vert unfulfilled. I want to regain myself so I've identified five things I'd like to improve...
After spending a year job hunting with no success, I've developed an expectation that I'm just going to fail. So I've stopped putting in 100% and instead, I'm releasing negative energy into my universe. But I'm a believer of manifesting and attracting the energy you put into the world. From now on I'm going to put my positive pants back on and be more pro-active by chasing what I want and having faith that I deserve those things and no matter how long it takes, I'll get there. No more 'I'll probably fail anyway' attitude - the universe will hear me. Stop being so goddamn lazy too Emmanuelle, you have to keep working hard and perfecting your words because you enjoy it.
Like I said, my 'cup half full' attitude is really lacking at the moment. I enjoyed that drunk happy optimism I always carried and I don't know where it went along the way but I'm making an effort to write down positive affirmations again and I'm going to start speaking them aloud too. Happiness is a choice and on some days it might take a little more effort, but you can do it.
My time management has gone to pot recently, I don't know how I managed to write a dissertation. I've said it a billion times but I am not a morning person and that's ok, but I should probably get up a tad earlier to achieve more in my day. I've started putting less on my to-do list so it's more achievable which has massively helped me feel more productive and less overwhelmed. When you work shifts it can be quite difficult to sort your plans around them but it's pure laziness and procrastination on my behalf so I really need to find a good routine. In the last week I've made an effort to get ready earlier and make a packed lunch and dinner for work and it has saved me so much money (and it's made my body feel much healthier).
Making time for things that make me happy
Whilst being pro-active, productive and positive are all fab things I want to improve on, it's also super important to make time for the happy things. I noticed that this years journal is a lot thinner than previous years so I've been writing in it way more and the difference in my well-being is huge. I've been reading, writing and scrapbooking for as little as 10 minutes a day and the little things truly do have an impact.
Embrace the adventure and stepping out of my comfort zone
I'm naturally a creature of comfort: I like my pjs, my routine and spending time with my family. But every now and then I get super restless. I really want to be the spontaneous adventurous type of person but that person fills me with anxiety. But like they say, nothing good ever comes out of your comfort zone and I think it's time to work on my self-belief and start trying more things! I'm thinking more classes, more trips away and a care-free attitude.